Extract from Brilliant NLP
So who is turning the kaleidoscope of your mind? Who is imposing their limiting beliefs on you? People around you will undoubtedly have a hand in making just a small turn, changing your beliefs and having an impact on your behaviour.
Take yourself back to your schooldays. How many things did you do poorly or drop out of because you believed you couldn’t do them?
Did your teachers, parents or peers reinforce or help you to create any limiting beliefs? Take a few moments to think of all the things you might be doing now if you hadn’t carried these limiting beliefs to the present day.
When you turn your focus to the workplace how many people are being held back by the limiting beliefs of their manager? In our workshops we find this is an astonishingly high number. So many managers today don’t delegate, encourage, stretch or even recognise superb performance in their people. One reason for this is their belief about their own capabilities as a manager and another is the beliefs they hold about the capabilities of others. Helping teams to develop positive beliefs and values about people can dramatically change attitudes which quickly cascade through the company with tangible results in performance. If you can identify and change a limiting belief you can take huge strides forward.
One belief represents just a small part of the kaleidoscope pattern and often forms part of a cluster of similar beliefs. In the extreme, a pattern of unresourceful thinking can lead into a whole host of unpleasant areas including phobias, blaming others, anger and low self-esteem. Being in control of your own kaleidoscope is therefore key to your success. In our mother and daughter example mentioned earlier, realising the limitation her mother’s belief had created for her, the daughter put maximum effort into the exercise and was highly delighted when she completed it successfully.
Beliefs can be limiting or empowering. Are yours serving you well? How can you recognise them and what can you do about them? Let’s look at challenging beliefs that may be hindering you.
A hard-working woman recently presented us with the belief ‘you have to work to earn money’. It was attached to a value about having enough money for her family to be secure. It was also important for her to have an active social life and spend time with her family. However, she had developed the habit of working late and at weekends. She became increasingly unhappy. When she realised how the belief was causing her stress she let go of it. She continued to enjoy her job as well as spending time going to concerts with friends and being with her partner. Very quickly her new and more powerful belief became ‘enjoying time with friends will give me the fulfilment I am seeking’. This attracted a whole new set of beliefs about what she was and wasn’t going to do. The initial change to her belief about work began a series of belief changes much like a falling stack of cards or dominoes.
Experience the techniques used in this book at first hand on the Real Success Programme
